And this is how it ends
by ilikedan
Summary: It's New York 1958 and Amelia Williams has accepted her fate as an ordinary wife and mother. The last thing she ever expected was to find her Raggedy Doctor after so many years. But maybe things can't just be picked up where they left off , maybe they've both changed in dramatic ways that will forever close the story of Amy Pond and the Doctor.


**I do not own Doctor Who. If I did, Matt Smith would not be allowed to leave (ever) and then this story would not need writing.**

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_Tell her this is the story of Amelia Pond..._

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There was a photo of the three of them up on the mantle, in the place of honor where everyone who entered their home could see it. It was sandwiched in between pictures of Rory at his practice and their son Anthony playing baseball but still the faded photo was no less precious to her. Her Raggedy Doctor was, and always would be, family.

It was a terribly worn photo, faded around the edges with a few creases marking how it had lain in her wallet making it the only photo she was able to take with her to 1938. They had been at an amusement park on Venus, one small trip out of hundreds but she'd managed to get the boys into a photo booth to preserve the memory of a day well spent. Such a happy picture of them, one she clung to when the Doctor was away, when the monsters got just a little too scary and when the reality of her new life had finally sunk in. And that that is why it sat just above the fireplace where the eternally young Amy and Rory Pond would always be with their Doctor.

_"Amy, Amy! Look at this, look we need this! Get Rory over here, he has all the Venusian money!" Amy laughed as the Doctor giddily pranced around in a multicolored hat that had a strange wooden animal perched on top. _

_"There's a reason we don't let you carry any money you idiot." She said giving him a friendly punch as she disentangled him from the hat. "Now Rory's waiting outside Doctor, there's still a lot to see before the park closes!"_

Amy took a deep breath and wiped the stray tear as she continued her dusting. She wished she had a picture of River to go alongside the Doctor, but there hadn't exactly been time to pack for this trip. Though she missed her daughter terribly she knew that somewhere out there in time and space they were running hand and hand away from unfathomable dangers. The happiness of the thought almost drowned out her envy. Not that she wasn't happy here, she was, she had her husband and her son and the life they had built for themselves here in New York 1958. Twenty years, sometimes she couldn't even stand to think about it, but that wouldn't make it any less true. It had been exactly twenty years since her life had changed dramatically and she had given the Doctor her final, teary farewell.

_"How is that roller coaster able to do that?" Rory asked quietly observing with trepidation all the gravity defying twists and turns and loops it made through the air. The Doctor threw a gangly arm around their shoulders as he explained the gravitational differences on Venus that allowed for such wild movements._

_"What do you think Pond? You weren't scared of anything when you were seven, do you think you can handle a little ride?" The Doctor asked with glittering eyes. Amy responded in like by dragging both her boys towards the ride, ignoring her husband's whines of apprehension._

_"Just so long as we don't find any cracks in the universe I think I should be fine."_

"Amy, I'm home." She smiled as Rory came in and planted a kiss on her temple like he did every day after work. Anthony was still at baseball practice and wouldn't be home for a while yet so she intended to make the most of their time alone. She turned to face her husband, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him tenderly. After a moment they broke apart and he smiled at her sadly.

"You've been thinking of him again haven't you?" She pursed her lips and was about to deny it when he stroked her cheek with a finger only for it to come back wet. She lowered her eyes in shame. "Hey, it's okay, I miss that mad and awkward alien too you know." She let her forehead fall to his chest as stroked her shorter but still mostly red hair which now resembled tarnished copper. She was reminded again of poor, dear Vincent which made her sad all over again.

"Shh, it's okay Amy, you know he wouldn't want you to cry. And you've no reason to cry, we're happy here and you know that somewhere out there he's happy too. We weren't the first and I can tell you we won't be the last. He's just fine." She nodded in his shirt feeling a bit ridiculous to crying over a man she hadn't seen in two decades but those times together were so precious and so intense she wasn't sure she'd ever be able to really let them go.

_"I can't believe you're eating that! What, what is that?" Amy snorted as her husband chewed thoughtfully on a sticky purple fruit. He nodded enthusiastically as he handed it towards her._

_"You've got to try this Amy! I can't pronounce it but it's really quite good." _

_"Why thank you, I think I will." The Doctor said bending down and taking a big bite of the fruit causing rivulets of maroon juices to drip down his chin and into Rory's hand. The oldest kid in the universe, his mouth full of fruit, grinned at her. "Mmm, it is good! Really Amy it's just like a candied apple but purple!"_

_"You're a mess." Amy said poking him in the chest while Rory grimaced and wiped his dirtied hand on a handkerchief. The Doctor beamed and planted a sloppy, juicy kiss on her cheek squealing in indignation while Rory frowned at his audacity._

_"Yes, and now so are you." The Doctor replied with a wink. _

"Why don't you take a rest and turn on the radio, see what's going on while I finish making up dinner." She said giving him a quick kiss on the mouth before reluctantly pulling out his embrace. He gave her shoulders a loving rub before wandering over to his chair and resting his feet after a long day of tending patients. She gave the back of head an affectionate glance before going off into the kitchen where the roast was almost done. She smiled to herself as she began slicing the vegetables, maybe thinking of telling Anthony that they were from another planet to convince him to eat them.

Her days of adventuring with the Doctor were over but she had a new one right here, raising her son and caring for her husband and she could be content with that. She would be able to rest peacefully knowing that wherever he was right now she could count on two things. One, he was causing a ruckus and two, that he would always, always love them.

"Amy!" the sound of Rory's startled voice made her jump and the sharp pain in her finger told her that she had cut herself. "Amy, get in here right now!" Grabbing a napkin from the counter she raced back into the living room where Rory sat hunched over in his chair listening intently to the radio.

"What is-" she began before he shushed her.

**_'-no one is quite sure what is causing the strange electrical attacks which have claimed no less than eleven souls in the Queens subway system but luckily it appears the authorities have the situation under control. A young girl spotted a blue box labeled 'Police' near the area where recent disturbances have occurred. The subways have been temporarily shut down and all citizens are advised to stay in their homes." _**

By the time Rory would turn away from the radio, he would turn to find a missing wife, an empty coat rack and an open front door.

_"Doctor you're going to have to let go of my hand sometime." Amy said trying to keep the annoyance out of her voice. After another minute or two in which the Doctor still wouldn't relinquish her hand she growled. "If you're that bloody scared of ghost trains, then why did we go on it in the first place?" _

_"Courage isn't just a matter of not being frightened, you know. It's-"_

_"What does going on a ghost train have to do with courage?" She asked still tugging on her hand which was rapidly losing feeling. _

_"It means facing your fear even when you know you're going to be frightened and doing it anyway. I gave myself that advice a long, long time before I did something terribly frightening."_

_"And the ghost train?"  
"Well did you see the size of those spiders Amelia? Have you no soul at all?"_

The subways had been roped off with guards posted at the entrance but a little sleight of hand and a heavy rock thrown in the opposite direction had distracted them long enough that she was able to sneak down. She shook her weak torch-_her flashlight_- as she entered the dankness of the subway system. They didn't use the subways all that often since everything they needed was within a few blocks so she wasn't terribly familiar with the layout. But she was savvy enough to know that there should be some form of lighting down here, her flashlight flickered. She was bitterly reminded of the Weeping Angels, the silent predators that were only statues when you looked at them, the creatures who separated her from her Raggedy Man permanently, until now that is.

She'd almost wished she had waited for Rory. All alone in the darkened subways of New York with a monster on the loose and the Doctor nowhere to be found she felt the first twinges of true fear rise up in her since their last encounter with the Angels in Manhattan. She slowly stepped forward, moving the flashlight left and right not quite sure what she was looking for. What would she do if she found the Doctor after all these years? Would it even be a version that knew her? Amy didn't think she could handle the same torture her daughter had happily endured.

There was a sizzle of electricity that echoed through the tunnels making it impossible for her to tell what direction it came from. She swallowed the tight lump in her throat. Or what if she came across the monster first and was struck down before she could even see her Doctor again? With shaking hands she turned off the torch and began to stumble her way forward, blindly grasping at the walls hoping that whatever was here would either announce itself or go away. She jumped and gasped loudly as another sharp scraping sound resounded through the empty station. She cupped a hand over her mouth hoping that her involuntary sound had not just gotten herself killed. She closed her eyes as she heard something approaching.

_"I don't know about you but my feet are killing me." Amy said flopping onto a bench much to the Doctor's disappointment. He held up the map pointing ardently at the brightly colored picture before gesturing to the tent located just over the next hill._

_"But Amy come on, the wild animal show starts in seven minutes and we won't get a good seat if we don't hurry!" He pouted even more as Rory collapsed next to her letting his head loll onto her shoulder. The Doctor began rocking on his feet, clearly impatient with his fragile humans._

_"We've been walking all day, a minute won't hurt anyone. Why don't you go on ahead and get us seats and we'll catch up okay?" She said, searching for any form of compromise that would get that ridiculous look off his face. He gave a little sigh and sat down on the bench next to her._

_"Well I suppose we can rest just a minute, I mean, resting can be cool, right?" _

_They didn't move even they heard the music from the show starting just over the hill and instead listened to the Doctor as he pointed and named all the stars that were just beginning to shine in the growing darkness. _

"Amy is that you?" A whispered voice asked and she felt her body go limp against the wall with relief.

"Oh my God Rory you scared the living daylights out of me, I thought you were the monster you stupid face! God don't you ever do that to me again!" She said turning on the flashlight again and shining it in Rory's direction where he squinted and held up his hand against the sudden light, she lowered it only to glint on metal.

"You brought your sword?" She asked incredulously while at the same time very thankful he'd had the foresight to bring something useful. He cleared his throat in embarrassment and began playing with the well worn weapon which was normally hidden in the back closet; but always polished and ready for use.

"Well I thought we might need it, you know, in case we came across the monster. I'm not as young as I used to be but this old Roman's still got some moves left." She smiled and reached for his hand, grateful beyond anything else that he was here with her. This was how it ought to be, Amy and Rory together against the world and everything that threatened it.

"Do we even know where to find him?" Rory whispered as they continued forward still hand in hand.

"Just go toward the scariest, most dangerous place you can find and the Doctor will be there somewhere." She smiled though she knew he couldn't see it in the dark. "You know, this feels like old times, us running around after the Doctor, I almost feel young again."

"Glad that one of us does." Rory said with a light groan as he stretched out his bad knees. She gave his hand a light squeeze of appreciation knowing he was here mostly to protect her. Though Rory did love the Doctor as well, he'd never had the special connection Amy shared with her Raggedy Doctor. Rory paused mid-step and gently grabbed the flashlight from her and switching it off.

"There's someone coming, stay back." He said in a voice so soft she barely heard it until he was moving her up against the wall, his body now in front of hers. "Stay quiet; it might not be the Doctor." No sooner had he spoke that the metal rails on the track lit up in a burst of cackling green electricity that would have fried anyone on them. With alien power spouting from the rails, she almost missed the footsteps approaching them at a fast pace. A feeling of recognition caused the hairs on the back of her neck to rise on their ends.

"Doctor!" She shouted as the man's silhouette became visible on the other side of the tracks through the wall of energy. "What do you need us to do?" She asked hoping he would remember her so he would trust her enough to help. She saw movement on his side and a slight singed sonic screwdriver landed just by Rory's feet having been tossed through the inferno. It looked different than the last one she had seen but it was still the same tool that impossible man lived by.

"I've added an energy converter to the device! If you can plug it into the rail's electrical circuits it should send out a signal that will neutralize the creature's powers and prevent it from manifesting." The Doctor responded back. Amy ducked from behind Rory and grabbed the hot screwdriver with her jacket still feeling the heat through the coarse material. With the light provided by the monster, she was able to run over to the station and into the small control room. Problem was she didn't know which one was the right plug when they all looked the same.

"Amy!" she heard Rory shout and she gasped as a bolt of electricity slammed into the wall next to her.

"Doctor!" She shouted again "Which one is the electrical circuit?" Another bolt hit, this time just to her left but definitely coming closer. She tried ducking to stay out of the monster's line of sight. She let out a squeak as the screwdriver in her hand spun her around and pulled her in the direction of one particular plug. He'd certainly modified the sonic since she last held it, made things a heluva lot easier. She shoved in it and held a hand up as more sparks erupted. She heard something that sounded like a terrible screaming that lasted a few moments before it, and the sparks, dropped off completely.

She sat there on the ground shaking for another moment or two before the lights above her flickered slowly back to life illuminating the station once more.

"Rory" she called weakly, standing to her feet only to feel relief as she felt Rory's arms wrap around her to help her up. On her feet again, she hugged him tightly, fighting off the pounding fear she felt with the safety of her husband's arms. "Where's the Doctor?"

"Present and accounted for."

_The fireworks later that night were amazing; Amy had never even seen half of the colors that exploded in the night sky. The only word she could think of to describe the event was magical and even that didn't seem to do the display justice. Rory had his arm around her shoulders holding her close to him as the wild lighting painted them magnificent colors of blue, green and yellow. _

_Next to her, the Doctor lightly held her hand, trying to be discreet so Rory wouldn't notice the unauthorized touching. His thumb traced her knuckles lazily as he took his eyes away from the sky to whisper in her ear._

_"I promised you the stars my little Amelia, tell me, was it worth the wait and the four psychiatrists?." She smiled and gently bumped his nose with her head._

_"You did alright this time Raggedy Man; I can't wait to see where you plan on taking us tomorrow to top this one." His eyes sparkled as the fireworks lit up his face in colors. _

_"Oh just you wait and see Pond, if you think this is good, you'll love what comes next."_

This man was not the Doctor, not her Doctor anyways. It shouldn't kill her but it does anyway. He looked human enough but everything that had made him hers was absent, the floppy hair, the tweed and suspenders. The bowtie. The smile he gave them was not one of loving recognition, but one of those pasted on smiles he gave to complete strangers to keep them from screaming.

She guessed that what they were to him now, strangers, what they would remain to him until he would crash into her backyard.

"Doctor, don't you recognize us? It's Amy and Rory, the Ponds remember?" She wanted to hit Rory; of course he didn't remember them because he hadn't met them yet! If he had remembered them he would have hugged them and started crying only to later deny it and talked of fezzes and adventures and "come along Ponds."

"Oh of course the Ponds! The girl who waited and the last centurion! So sorry, it has been awhile, I hardly recognized you! I guess the sword should have been a giveaway. Good to see you again." Somewhere inside of her, her heart was breaking.

The new Doctor stepped forward under the light; the new face was so disconcerting. Decades of seeing that chin and those old green eyes had made it impossible to see anything else. She knew about regeneration and she knew about how it could change him but she still couldn't quite grasp it. If this was a future body of her Doctor then what had happened to the old one, the one she had loved?

"See, look, new face, well not that new, new to you I suppose." He stopped and picked up the sonic, examining it for damage before tucking it away in the back pocket of his trousers. Well how about that? River was right, everything changes.

"Thanks for the help by the by. Nasty little bugger, I've been chasing him all across New York. A long way from home he is, all the way from Varos in the constellation of Cetes. That pulse you sent through the subway's electrical systems will prevent it from manifesting here. It's been dispersed into the atmosphere and will probably head back to Varos with its tail in between it's legs, well you know, metaphorically speaking." The subway grew quiet and the Doctor turned his eyes to the floor as his shoes drew circles in the dirt.

"So you've been good then? Happy here? I'd always wondered where you'd ended up; glad you got to stay together at least." He said lightly as if he hadn't been on his hands and knees begging her to stay the last she'd seen him, blatant tears dripping down his face. As if all of their love and memories had just been a small endnote in the book of his life, not even worth looking up like she'd always feared.

"Yeah," she wheezed out, trying to keep the tears at bay. "And you Raggedy Man?" He frowned uncomfortably and began cracking his knuckles, another new habit.

"Haven't heard that name in a bit. I'm fine, just wandering about, the ole mad man in a box." He paused, "that was with you wasn't it?" Amy bit her lip and nodded. "Right, so same old, same old I guess. Picked up some new companions, Clara was there for a good while, a few others since but none stayed too long so I've been on my own for a little while."

"Does River stop by every now again? I mean I hope she kept her promise to look after you." Amy asked ashamed at how her voice was cracking. The Doctor began rubbing his arms as his eyes went from the floor to the ceiling never meeting her own teary eyes.

"Oh River's been gone awhile now, I haven't seen her since, gosh, all the way back to Trenzalore with Clara. She died at the Library, couple of bodies ago, before I really knew her. Every time I met her with you guys was after I had seen her die. It got rather confusing with the whole 'out of order' thing." Nothing could stop the tears now as the breath left her body, and she felt Rory's painfully tight grip on her shoulders.

She'd often wished her Doctor would talk to her more, that he wasn't so caught up with his blasted 'spoilers'. Now she's beginning to appreciate his need secrets. Oh her poor River, her beautiful little Melody… The Doctor shuffled anxiously at their reaction.

"Oh, I suppose you didn't know that? Funny, I thought I'd told you that before you left. So sorry." He finally looked at her and though she could hear the words she couldn't feel them. Couldn't feel the love she knew this man had felt for her and her family at one point. Whatever love had been there had been buried and forgotten by the many years that had undoubtedly passed, maybe even purposely to block out all those niggling human emotions he tried so hard to deny. This man before her was an alien in every sense of the word.

_"Alright then Ponds, off we go! It's been a fun day but I suppose for you humans it's getting late. I can never quite tell, tell me Amelia, is it late for you?" Amy flipped her hair not letting on how exhausted she really was; she wondered how the Doctor had so much energy with so little sleep._

_"Well, it is late but I think we've got one last walk about before Rory here collapses." Amy said watching her poor husband's eyes open and close in an attempt to stay awake._

_"No, no, I'm-" a loud yawn interrupted him "I'm fine, if you want to keep going that's fine." Rory said rubbing his eye with his palm. The Doctor beamed._

_"Splendid! Look, we only covered about half the park; we can probably get the last bit in the few hours before the park closes! Come along Ponds, I challenge you both to some arcade games!" The Doctor said grabbing both their hands and running off._

"Well then," he said after more crushing silence. He stuck out his hand which Rory slowly grasped and they shook. It was the strangest thing to see the Doctor shaking his hand when he usually hugged. "It's been lovely to see you both, it relives me to see you both doing well, but I want to make sure the TARDIS is okay, she's never been partial to electricity." He said casually jerking his thumb over his shoulder. Amy peered over hoping to catch a glimpse of that beloved blue box but it was nowhere to be seen.

"Where is she?" she asked, hoping that there wouldn't be another disappointment in the next answer a _'oh sorry Pond, the police box thing was getting old, decided to try something new.' _

"I keep her cloaked whenever possible, I can change my face but too many people have been recognizing her and frankly I could do without all the attention. I guess someone must have spotted her before or else you wouldn't be here now. She's right in between the two signs." Amy still saw nothing and she found she couldn't look at the wall or this imposter anymore and leaned into her husband's shoulder. The Doctor began to back up slowly, clearly looking for a way out of this awkward situation and back into the safety of his ship.

The man who is always running, why did she ever let herself believe they were different?

"Oh I've got something for you before I go, they've been taking up space in the storage compartment. Well not really since the TARDIS is infinite but mostly they kind of annoy me. Don't know what else to do with them and really-" he stopped and Amy looked up to see him staring at her with that old loving gaze he used to wear. For just a moment, her Doctor was there again. "You ought to have them." He stepped out and opened the door to the invisible TARDIS appearing to disappear as he went inside the machine.

Following him, she poked her head inside and wrinkled her nose in disappointment. The interior had indeed changed and though it was very…Spock, she found herself missing the whimsical old orange control room. She ran her hand up and down the door frame lovingly.

"Hello there old girl, how've you been doing?" The machine hummed and Amy felt real warmth for the first time since she entered the subway. The tears started again and she leaned her forehead against the frame. "I've missed you, now you-you take care of him. You're the only one who ever stays with him so you take care of him alright? With all the Ponds gone you've got to watch out for that stupid old man." She choked out giving the cool metal a quick kiss. The ship hummed, this time a bit more sadly, and Amy knew that she understood.

The Doctor appeared again with a medium sized box in his hands, without a word he handed it over and Amy ran her fingers over the worn box. What could possibly be in here that this man hadn't already stolen from her?

"Well, lovely seeing you Amy, maybe I'll run into you some other time. Um I'd give you a lift back to London but the whole paradox thing prevents me from interfering with your personal timeline…" he rubbed at his neck and Amy shook her head.

"No, this is our home now but," she bit her lip "if you ever want to stop by, you know for tea or something, you're always welcome. We miss you terribly. Rory will give the address." The Doctor smiled, as Rory handed him one of his business cards which contained their address.

"Amelia Pond," he said, fondly popping the 'P'. "Might drop by again soon, you know, just to see how you kids are doing." Amy smiled back though she suspected her smile was as fake as his.

She knew he had no intention of coming back here again; he'd probably make sure he was never in New York so not to run across them again. She, likewise, wouldn't have gone with him even if it was her Doctor. The paradoxes had banished them here and they had made a life for themselves, one she wouldn't give up for all of time and space.

No, this would be the last time the Doctor would ever see them.

"See you around." He said, giving her head a quick pat, the only time thus far he had touched her, and stepped into the invisible TARDIS. The familiar sound of the parking brakes sounded and she could just make out the outline of the blue police telephone box before it was gone for good. A sad smile appeared on her face, somethings she supposed would never change.

"You alright?" Rory asked coming up behind her. Amy took a deep breath letting the last few tears fall harmlessly onto the box. It hurt, it hurt a lot, but she'd get over it. She was the girl who waited for the Doctor to come and save her but now she had to let go of that. But how could she when all she's ever known is waiting for that stupid, wonderful man? She looked up at Rory and knew she didn't have to wait for the perfect man to come when he was standing right next to her.

"No, but I will be." He kissed her softly on her temple.

"What's in the box?" She shook her head and with courage she didn't know she possessed, she opened the lid.

_"Come on! Come on! Get in you two! We need something to remember this day by!" Amy said shoving her husband and the Time Lord into the photo booth. Rory had found a second wind after having a sugary confection but the park would be closing in just under 15 minutes and Amy would not leave until she had her souvenir. _

_"Do we really need this Amy? I mean, you've got a t-shirt and everything. I'm tired and I'm pretty sure they're about ready to throw us out." Rory said as he was squished into the tiny booth, the alien practically sitting on top of him looking exceedingly uncomfortable. Amy pouted angrily. _

_"No, this isn't just for the park. Things are going good right now for us. We're happy, we're together, we beat the Silence in 1969 and…" she looked briefly at the Doctor "you never know when something might happen to us. So I just want to remember this, always, even when we're not in the TARDIS anymore." She said squeezing next to the Doctor. He lovingly nudged her as she paid the money._

_"Now don't talk like that Amy, things are good because they are meant to be and I promise I will never ever let anything happen to the two of you. You're allowed to stay with me as long as you can put up with this old man. Forever if you want that, remember that Amelia, I'm yours forever. Now…" he grinned._

_"Smile." _

The contents of the box had Amy crying again and she could even hear Rory sniffling behind her. She'd seen a regeneration before and had always thought it was a second chance at life. Now she knew the truth, it was death. Death to her version of the Doctor who would never, ever come back; who was as dead as if he had been burned at that lake in Utah. Somewhere in the universe this new Doctor was probably befriending another little girl who would see him as their Doctor while her Doctor became as lost and faded as the photograph on their mantle.

The collection of bowties thrown haphazardly into the box proved once and for all that not even Time Lords could really escape death, not completely.

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_And this is how it ends._

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Okay, I just want to say that though I'm sad about Matt I'm very optimistic about 12. I know the Who team will do great things and I'm sure I'll love Matt's successor just as much... well, I'm sure they'll be okay at least. But this came to me as a thought, how regeneration changes the way the Doctor views companions and how absolutely tragic it would be if he finally got to see his beloved Ponds again but that special love had died with 11 leaving 12 awkward and uncomfortable with the memory of his previous incarnation's feelings. There's something sad about having knowledge of love but not feeling it, isn't there? Anyway, just a thought, a sad thought I came up with in the days when the announcement of Matt's retirement seemed to kill my soul. This is not my theory on 12, just trying to make him as totally different from 11 as possible. Good night now, hope you like and reviews are appreciated.


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